Monday, April 12, 2010

Mothering woes

I've got a couple of questions. I'm writing right now with a little bit of desperation...

Parenting issue #1:

Ethan has had a binky for a long time. But when he turned a year or so it was only for nap time and bedtime. He's been fine with that, but he has now become very attached to it, and will go into his room, grab his binky and blanky, and lay down on his bed just so he can have his binky. He will also sneak around sucking on it at random times. On Thursday night we decided that we would tell him that binky's are for babies and big boys don't need them anymore, but that he can still sleep with his blanket and a favorite stuffed animal if he needed to. He didn't give us any problems. Friday nap time was a different story. We were out and about, so we didn't get back in time exactly for his nap, so we thought we just missed our window. He went to bed fine without it. Same story on Saturday. No nap, but went to bed fine. Sunday we have church at 11:30, missed his nap, then he screamed a lot Sunday night, but eventually fell asleep. Right now (Monday) it is nap time, and he is sitting in his room playing with his cars.

Do I have to sacrifice nap time in order to get rid of his binky??? Is it worth it? We are talking about a kid who has a regular 2-3 hour nap every single day. I KNOW he needs it, because he is a beast for the rest of the day without it. Maybe we can put him to bed at 6:30 or 7. Ugggh.

Parenting issue #2:

Leah doesn't like solid food! She doesn't like rice cereal, nor does she like other baby foods. I have tried bananas, peas, pears, applesauce. I've tried mashing up foods instead of the baby foods. She will NOT have it! This is totally the opposite of Ethan who loved everything and anything we gave him. I'm ready to drop a feeding or two of nursing, but because little Leah will not eat anything else I've got to nurse her. I'm not overly worried, just wondering if there's anything else I can try, or if I just have to keep at it, and eventually she'll give in.

If you have any advice, please share!

p.s. I really love my children most of the time. :)


Shanicherie said...

Obviously I haven't done it, but I've heard 2 things a handful of times from different people:

-together you snip the nipples off the binkies so he knows they're toast
-together you tie them to a balloon and watch them fly away (make it like a party so it's exciting and fun)

With Leah, I've read that it just takes some babies a lot longer to like solid foods! I think it's something like trying 10 times per food. You could try adding cinnamon. Do you make your own or do pre-made? Whichever you're doing, maybe you should switch and see if she likes the other better? Hugh will take some things only in the jar, some things only fresh.

Good luck!

Melissa said...

Good luck with the binky issue. My sons gave up their binkies at 18 months old without any big issues. I can't imaging going without naps at that age. Ugh! I have known people who put their kids to be at 7 (Thornes for example) but I don't know if they still napped during the day, or if so how long.

We're starting AJ on solids now too. He likes oatmeal and his doctor told us today to fast track him on other foods. The iron isn't absorbed very much from rice, oatmeal, etc. and they aren't as concerned about allergies now as they use to be. We were told to try something new every 2-3 days and give it to him up to three times a day.

I don't know what to suggest other than trying finger foods as soon as you feel she's ready. My boys ate bread at seven months and then we started with cereals and other finger foods pretty quickly. Bread was just something easy to tie them over when we were out and wanted something more substantial than jarred foods.

Update us on what works and what doesn't!

Kathleen said...

One of my friends down here is having the same problem with solid foods and her son. He's almost 8 months old and she's tried everything the doctor has told her to do and he won't take any of it. hmmm that's not very helpful...but if she comes up with an answer I'll let you know!

Susan said...

Obviously I haven't had any first-hand experiences with getting rid of binkies. But I had a friend throw a 'bye-bye-binkie' party where they very ceremoniously threw away the binky. It worked for them. Any time the kid wanted the binky, she would just remind him that they said 'bye-bye' to it. Who knows if it really works. But I guess it could be worth a shot. Good luck!!

Haas & Co. said...

Does Ethan like watching the garbage truck?
What we did with our oldest was kind of random but it worked perfectly. One day I suggested we give his binkie to the garbage man and then I talked about it occasionally for a few weeks. On a random morning I thought to myself, "hey the garbage man is coming soon" so I suggested we give him our pacifier. N took his binkie and threw it in the trashcan then watched me take it outside to the road. Thankfully, he was awake to see the garbage man come throw it in the truck and squish it.
I kept a hidden binkie just in case, but he never asked for one again, he would just say "the garbage truck took my binkie and it went SQUISH". Haha.
So it's random, but if he loves trucks it may be worth a shot.

John and Clara Balsmeier said...

You might want to try laying down with Ethan for a few minutes. Not until he falls asleep, that might cause another bad habit, but just until he is settled down and groggy.

The food, I would just keep trying. You might want to try skipping a feeding and then trying the solids so she is good and hungry...she might be more receptive.

Good luck!!

Lonna said...

I am sad to say that when we had Gwen give up the binky she did stop taking naps. But she is in bed and asleep by 8 pm and sleeps until around 8 in the morning, so I don't know if that is a happy trade off or not some days.

In retrospect I have often thought about what the major problem was about the binky? Gwen also just used it at night and for a nap, but I think that I was feeling lots of pressure from other people saying things like shouldn't she be done with that, or isn't she a little old for one of those. We really did just do it because of what other people were saying, and I kind of regret that we gave in and didn't just let her decide to be done with it, or wait until we had a better system with naps. But that is just my personal reflections.

But when we had her "give" it away it was to Ryan and Leslie's baby. (Liv) Gwen knew her and that she was kind of like our baby since we saw her often. I told her that the binky was for babies and that Liv was going to need some binkies, we put them in a special bag and set them out for the binky fairy to deliver to Liv ( or a baby who would need them) and since she knew where they were going and that baby Liv needed them she went with it, she did also get a new toy from the fairy for her good deed. She asked about it now and then and I would remind her about baby Liv needing it and she would talk about giving it to the fairy, so it worked pretty well.

As for the switch to solids good luck I hope you find something that works. Kids are tricky and it makes it even more of an adventure that no two are alike.